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110 National Bagelfest Puns That Are a Hole Lot of Fun

By: Priyanshu Sagar
Updated On: May 11, 2025

Bagelfest is a time for fun and laughter, and what better way to celebrate than with some hilarious bagel puns? Imagine a party where bagels are not just tasty treats on your breakfast plate, but also the stars of jokes that make everyone smile. From silly jokes about cream cheese to clever one-liners that make you giggle, you are sure to find a pun that will have you laughing out loud. Are you ready to enjoy some unforgettable laughs? Keep reading to find puns that will make your Bagelfest truly special!

Welcome to Bagelfest, where humor and delicious bagels come together in a wonderful celebration! Get ready to chuckle as we dish out some of the best bagel puns that will tickle your funny bone. With so many funny jokes about bagels, you’ll find the perfect one to share with family and friends, leaving everyone smiling and craving more!

Best Puns & Jokes

Bagelfest is all about celebrating the fluffy, circular delights we all adore! Get ready to roll with some of the best bagel puns and jokes out there.

  • Why did the bagel break up with the toaster? It found someone who was less of a crumby partner.
  • How do bagels get around town? They take the yeast express!
  • Why are bagels such great comedians? Because they always deliver the punchline in the hole!
  • What do you call a bagel that can play the guitar? A dough-re-mi!
  • Why did the bagel go to therapy? It had a lot of layers to peel back.
  • What did the bagel say to the cream cheese? “You complete me, but don’t spread yourself too thin!”
  • Why did the chef throw a bagel into the air? He wanted to see it rise to the occasion!
  • What did the bagel do when it won the lottery? It got a little toasted on the dough!
  • How do bagels always stay in shape? They do their crunches every morning!
  • What did one bagel say to the other at the party? “We’re on a roll tonight!”
  • Why did the bagel refuse to play cards? It was afraid of getting toasted!
  • How did the bagel feel after a workout? A little bit hole-y but mostly proud!
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite game? Ring toss, obviously!
  • Why did the bagel get a promotion? It was always rising to the top!
  • What did the bagel say when it passed the bakery? “I knead to stop for a sweet moment!”
  • How do you catch a runaway bagel? Use a cream cheese net!
  • Why was the bagel so confident? It realized it was the whole package!
  • What did the bagel order at the deli? The everything, obviously!
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good beat to roll to!
  • Why did the bagel blush? It saw the schmear across the room!
  • How do bagels keep their secrets? They always stay under wraps!
  • Why don’t bagels ever get lost? Because they always follow the yeast path!
  • What did the bagel say after its first date? “I think we’ve a real connection!”
  • Why are bagels bad at keeping secrets? Because they always get toasted!
  • How does a bagel celebrate its birthday? With a big, round party!
  • Why did the bagel go to school? To learn how to be a little less doughy!
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite season? Spring, because it loves the rise!
  • What do you call a bagel that tells tales? A folktale dough!
  • Why did the bagel apply for a job? It was looking for a roll in life!
  • What did the bagel say during a marathon? “I’m on a roll, don’t slow me down!”
  • How do bagels stay informed? They always read the daily toast!
  • Why did the bagel sit down during a meeting? It didn’t want to be a part of the round table!
  • How did the bagel get its degree? It filled out the dough-cumentation!
  • What do you call a bagel’s favorite exercise? The dough-nut treadmill!
  • Why did the bagel bring a ladder to the bakery? It wanted to rise above the rest!
  • What did the bagel get for its anniversary? A little extra cream cheese!
  • Why do bagels make terrible detectives? They always leave a trail of crumbs!
  • What’s a bagel’s go-to excuse? “I’m just rolling with the punches!”
  • How did the bagel respond to criticism? “I can take it—I’m pretty well-rounded!”

Funny One-Liners & Wordplay

Bagelfest brings a lot of doughy goodness, and what better way to celebrate than with some light-hearted puns? Here are some delightful bagel-themed one-liners to roll with.

  • I told my bagel it was the whole package, but it said it felt a bit hollow inside.
  • When the bagel hit the gym, it said it was time to get a little bit more “butter” fit.
  • Knots in my hair? Nah, I just like to keep my bagel style twisted.
  • I tried to make a bagel pun, but it just ended up being a real dough-dy joke.
  • The bagel went to the party alone because it couldn’t find its “cream” of the crop.
  • My bagel won the lottery, and now it’s living a toasted life every day!
  • When bagels get into disagreements, they just agree to “muffin” about it.
  • The bagel became a motivational speaker because it always knew how to rise to the occasion.
  • I once knew a bagel that went to therapy; it really needed to get to the “cream” of its issues.
  • After all the running, my bagel said it was ready to be baked into a soft life.
  • The bagel’s favorite type of music? Anything that you can really sink your teeth into!
  • Bagel bakers are always on a roll, but they really knead to take a break sometimes.
  • Why didn’t the bagel get a promotion? It couldn’t find the right “spread” for the job.
  • When bagels go camping, they always remember to bring their “pocket” of dough!
  • I asked the bagel to tell me a secret, but it said that’s just too “crumby” of a topic.
  • The bagel felt underappreciated until it realized it was always on the “slice” of life.
  • Bagels love to be photographed because they believe in always putting their best “glaze” forward.
  • I once had a rebellious bagel that refused to stick to the recipe; it really wanted to be “poppy”!
  • The bagel told me it wanted to be famous, so I said, “Just roll with it!”
  • My bagel isn’t just a breakfast item; it’s really a “hole” new world on a plate.
  • When bagels get together, their conversations never go stale; they’re always “on a roll.”
  • I tried to explain the situation to my bagel, but it just kept saying “I’m too toasted to care.”
  • The bagel artist was praised for their work, but they’d to admit it all just came down to “knead” and “roll.”
  • My bagel has aspirations to become an architect; it dreams of building “cream-cheese” towers.
  • When bagels work together, they create a powerhouse; that’s what I call a “bready” team!
  • The bagel decided to teach a class on self-worth; it was all about appreciating your “inner crust.”
  • I asked my bagel how it felt about being different, and it said, “I wasn’t born just to be plain.”
  • The bagel wanted to be a comedian, but it couldn’t figure out how to fill the room with “dough-larious” jokes.
  • There’s nothing like a well-baked bagel at sunrise; it really helps “light” up the day!
  • The bagel joined a book club because it wanted to get into some “thick” plots.
  • When bagels retire, do they sit around in a “spread” of cream cheese and reminisce?
  • The bagel wanted to become a dancer, but it always ended up just doing “the slice.”
  • My bagel once won a debate; it had such a well-rounded argument that nobody could “top” it!

Top Witty Puns

Bagelfest is the perfect time for some hilarious puns that will keep your spirits as high as a fresh bagel is fluffy. Get ready for a spread of humor that’s sure to roll you over with laughter!

  • Why did the bagel go to therapy? It kneaded to work through its inner crust issues.
  • When the bagel won the lottery, it was on a roll to success!
  • I told my bagel it was the best; it said, “I’m on a whole new level!”
  • The chef made a bagel shaped like a donut, but it couldn’t handle the pressure and ended up in a hole lot of trouble.
  • When the bagel joined the gym, everyone said it was just there to get toasted.
  • The bagel tried to impress the croissant, but she said he was too one-dimensional.
  • Why did the bagel break up with the cream cheese? It found a butter match!
  • The bagel tried to start a band, but it couldn’t find the right jam session.
  • When the bagel has a tough day, it just says, “It’s okay, I’m still rising!”
  • I asked the bagel why it was always so busy; it replied, “I’m just rolling with the dough!”
  • The bagel entered a talent show and proved it could be a real dough-licious entertainer!
  • Why did the bagel start a podcast? It wanted to get its voice spread out!
  • The bagel became a motivational speaker, encouraging everyone to “dough” their best!
  • When the bagel dismissed another’s accomplishments, it said, “Donut compare your journey to mine!”
  • Why was the bagel so good at math? It loved to work with “whole” numbers!
  • The bagel was invited to every party because it always brought the best toppings!
  • I told my bagel I was feeling down; it said, “Don’t worry, we’ll sesame our way through!”
  • When the bagel became a detective, it always found the crust of the matter first.
  • The bagel tried to join the fashion scene but concluded it wasn’t fit for the haute cuisine!
  • Why did the bagel refuse to play hide and seek? It always gave itself away with its “toasty” personality!
  • The bagel thought about running for office, but it was afraid it couldn’t handle the ‘dough-nations’!
  • Why did the bagel cross the road? To tell the other side it was more than just a breakfast item!
  • The bagel started a charity; its mission was to help others rise to their potential!
  • When the bagel got promoted, it said, “I’m just getting ‘dough’-sitive feedback!”
  • The bagel wanted to share its motivations but realized it was too stuffed with ideas!
  • At the bakery, the bagel was considered a real “hole” in one!
  • Why was the bagel always invited to brunch? Because it truly knew how to bring the “spread”!
  • The bagel tried stand-up comedy but got toasted by the crowd.
  • When the bagel learned to surf, it said, “I’m really starting to feel like a pro on the wave!”
  • Delightful as it was, the bagel knew it couldn’t hold a candle to the muffin’s muffins.
  • The bagel’s favorite workout was the dough aerobics class!
  • Why was the bagel so humble? Because it knew it was just a little ’round’ in this big world!
  • The bagel cheered on its friends in the marathon, saying, “Stay in your own lane, you’ll finish this race!”
  • The bagel always knew how to rise to the occasion, especially when it thought it was being watched!

Best Jokes & Puns for Instagram

Get ready to sprinkle some humor on your Bagelfest Instagram posts! Here are some punny gems to share and spread the joy.

  • Why did the bagel go to therapy? It couldn’t stop feeling so kneady.
  • I wanted to tell you a bagel joke, but it’s a little too stale.
  • Have you heard about the bagel who got a promotion? It really rose to the occasion!
  • Guess what the bagel said to the doughnut? You’re just glazed over!
  • Why did the baker break up with the bagel? They didn’t see a hole future together.
  • I tried to start a band with some bagels, but we just couldn’t find the right roll.
  • What did the bagel say to the cream cheese? You’re spreadin’ the love!
  • Why don’t bagels ever get lost? They always know how to find their way back to the dough.
  • I asked the bagel about its favorite exercise and it said ‘popping fresh’.
  • Did you hear about the bagel that went to school? It wanted to be a little smarter than average bread!
  • What’s a bagel’s favorite party game? Twister, because it loves to twist and shout!
  • The bagel wanted to be an artist, but it couldn’t find its inner crust!
  • How do bagels stay in shape? They do crunches on the dough mat!
  • Why was the bagel always calm in stressful situations? It knew how to roll with the punches!
  • What do you call a bagel that tells jokes? A pun-dough!
  • Why did the bagel get in trouble at school? It kept rolling with the wrong crowd!
  • The bagel tried to be a comedian, but its jokes just didn’t stick.
  • I asked the bagel how it feels about being toasted; it said, “Just a little burnt out!”
  • Why don’t bagels tell secrets? Because they might get spread around!
  • The bagel started a podcast; it wanted to make some dough on the side!
  • How does a bagel express its feelings? By showing a little emotion at the edge!
  • What do bagels wear to the beach? A whole lot of cream cheese!
  • Did you hear about the bagel that couldn’t stop singing? It always kept its voice on a roll!
  • Why was the bagel a great teacher? It always knew how to give ’em a nice warm-up!
  • The bagel wanted to be on a reality show, but it was too plain for the casting call.
  • I asked the bagel if it wanted to go out; it said it wasn’t ready to commit to a real crust yet.
  • What did one bagel say to another during a race? “Let’s donut stop now!”
  • Why are bagels terrible at poker? Because they always show their holes!
  • Did you hear the bagel crashed the party? It always brings the best toppings!
  • How did the bagel become wealthy? It made some smart investments in cream cheese stocks!
  • The bagel wanted to run for office but couldn’t find the right platform.
  • What’s a bagel’s motto? Better bread than dead!
  • Why did the bagel always get invited to events? It really knows how to rise to the occasion!
  • How does a bagel get through tough times? It just keeps doughing!
  • The bagel thought about changing its name to bagel-icious, but it didn’t want to be overbaked!
  • Why did the bagel go to outer space? It wanted to see the ‘crust-ial’ stars!
  • The bagel tried to write a book, but it couldn’t find a good plot twist.
  • What do bagels do when they’re not working? They loaf around!
  • Why did the toasted bagel feel left out? Because it wasn’t feeling butter at the party!
  • The bagel wanted to start a fashion line, but its designs just didn’t rise to the occasion!
  • What do you call a bagel that can play the piano? A legendary dough-key!
  • Why do bagels make great friends? Because they always stick together at the hole!

Conclusion

So there you have it—110 puns that’ll make you laugh while you munch on your favorite bagel! Whether you’re sharing these gems with friends or sprucing up your social media, these jokes are sure to spread smiles. Remember, life’s too short to take seriously, especially when there’s bagel humor to enjoy. So go ahead, roll with the fun and keep that laughter flowing! You’ll be the life (and flavor) of any bagelfest!

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Priyanshu Sagar

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